By Ora Cook
I can’t explain it nor do I understand it, but the feelings are real. Despite hearing how great the movies are, I just cannot not get past the internal block that is preventing me from watching 12 Years a Slave and Lee Daniel’s The Butler or anything else related to the struggle of Black Americans.
But recently, I attended a retreat where Dr. Yulanda Tyre spoke and I learned that I am suffering from compassion fatigue.
Dr. Yulanda Tyre has an extensive background in counseling. She holds degrees in psychology and community counseling and a Ph.D. in counselor education. She’s spent the last 15 years of her career in higher education where she provides counseling to college students. Currently she is the Director of Auburn University Counseling Center in Montgomery Alabama.
In 2017, Dr. Tyre began her own counseling practice called Reignite. In her practice she continues to provide counseling services to those in her community. In addition, Dr. Tyre has written a 21-day devotional titled Reignite, which provides 21 days of guidance to help readers achieve their goals.
Her counseling experience has resulted in her being well briefed in the knowledge of compassion fatigue and burnout. In this interview she gives great insight into these areas.
What is the difference between compassion fatigue and burnout?
Compassion fatigue is the emotional residue which occurs from experiencing trauma or just hearing about traumatic events. It can occur after an interaction with one client or from listening to the news. For example, hearing the repeated stories of the doctor who sexually abused hundreds of gymnasts can cause compassion fatigue. Or it could be that someone is having a bad week and then hears about the fires in California. The combination can tip the scale and led to compassion fatigue.
Compassion fatigue can happen instantly and the recovery can be quick if it’s realized early and is addressed.
Burnout is the emotional weighing down that happens over an extended time period and results in the mental and emotional checking out process. Burnout happens for various reasons–your clients, a heavy workload, or a lack of resources. Since burnout happens over an extended of period time, it takes longer to diagnose and to recover.
If someone experiences compassion fatigue in their profession, does this mean they are in the wrong occupation?
I don’t think so. It is important to be aware of how our careers can affect us, but since compassion fatigue can happen in any vocation, I don’t know if it can be avoided. As a counselor, I may have more exposure to situations that can result in compassion fatigue, but a banker can experience it when a customer tells her their house burnt down or that they just lost their job.
A worker in a grocery store can experience compassion fatigue as she communicates with someone at the checkout counter. So can a stay at home mom listening to the news or speaking with her neighbors. Wherever there is communication, there is always the potential for compassion fatigue.
What are the symptoms of Compassion fatigue and burnout?
There isn’t an exact listing of symptoms. Everyone is affected differently. However, these are some of the symptoms I experienced when I dealt with compassion fatigue.
• Feeling anxiety especially on Sunday afternoon or evening. I would procrastinate and try to drag out Sunday avoiding the process of thinking about Monday and preparing for work.
• I was irritable to the point where I didn’t want to be bothered with anyone, even my family.
• Emotional checking out. When I arrived at work, I would emotionally close the door or turn my emotions off. I didn’t want anyone to engage me. I said to myself, I am going to stay here and do my work and you people ought not talk to me.
• I disconnected from the people I was supposed to serve.
Compassion fatigue and burnout not only affect us emotionally, they attack us physically as well. Someone may have continual headaches or their immune systems starts to break down. Many people complain of pain in the shoulders, or pain in their sides or simply not feeling their best physically.
A person really needs to know themselves to determine if the symptoms are connected to compassion fatigue or burnout or something else. For example, the cold that is taking too long to go away, is it fatigue or an actual illness? It is important for us to pay attention to the clues our bodies are giving us.
What should we do when have compassion fatigue and/or burnout?
Look at what is really impacting you. Is it poor time management, poor communication or something else? Is it inflexibility? Many people do not like change or adjusting and this can impact us because we are too rigid. Or are you too flexible and you need to bring some structure and balance into your life?
Make sure there are people you can talk to about your feelings, emotions, and what you are experiencing.
Become intentional about taking care of yourself. Just as you are intentional about the tasks you must do and you make sure you plan for them, you need to be intentional and plan time away from your everyday tasks, whether it be a vacation or simply a day out of the office.
Find additional things that bring you joy. Work should bring us a certain amount of joy, but we need to find out what other things balance us out. Is it writing, spending more time outside or with family? This way the mind and body can completely reset.
Should counseling be an option?
Counseling can be important and if needed, by all means, get it. However, I believe counseling should go in tangent with other things. A person can go to counselling forever and ever, but maybe they just need to pray. I recommend they do that. They can pray, but their body requires exercise. If they are getting counseling, praying, and exercising but eating Kit Kats all day, there will still be an emotional imbalance.
One is not more important than the other. To overcome compassion fatigue and burnout, we must bring balance back into our lives and we should practice habits that will result in wholeness in every aspect of our lives.
Overcoming compassion fatigue requires that we focus on ourselves which is still frowned on depending on your generation and culture.
This is true. However, you must decide for yourself how you are going to manage. When my daughters were young I decided what type of legacy I was going to leave them. I did not want them to see me working so hard or being so affected by life that they had to end up taking care of me. I made sure I modelled what I wanted them to see and learn.
There were times when instead of washing dishes or doing laundry, I felt it was more important to spend time cuddling with them in bed and watching a movie. I know some people have problems with this, but this is what I decided was best for me. We all need to decide for ourselves our preventative tactics.
How long does it take to go away?
There isn’t a magical time frame. Each person has their own a timeline. Healing is a continuous journey because life is continuously coming at us. Life is not a check mark—check, I went to the gym today and never have to go again. Check, I ate that salad today and don’t have to eat another one for two weeks.
Any last-minute tips for compacting or preventing compassion fatigue?
We are all leaders in some type of way. As leaders, we should model ways to care for our staff, children, family, and friends. If Joan seems to be acting unusual, check on her. Let her know you are concerned and that you are available if she needs someone to talk to. Offer to watch the children of a single mother one afternoon. Bring treats into the work place. These little steps show that you care and want the best for the people in your life.
You can follow Dr. Tyre on:
Facebook at Reignite
Reignite-life.com
Love the interview! Great job!
Thank you.